Now I Have To Be Blunt...

Being a female on online dating sites opens you up for all sorts of questions. I have compiled a list of the most common questions asked by men (and some women) of me over the years.

1. Yes, they're 100% real and definitely mine. (Yes, it's what you think)
2. I'm straight and not looking to "convert" right now. (Sorry ladies, but thank you anyways!)
3. No, I am not a "cougar". Meow.
4. No, I am NOT interested in meeting you in an hour, tonight or even tomorrow. Don't ask.
5. No, I am not a dominatrix. (WTF?)
6. I prefer men in the 38-55 age group ONLY.
7. No, I am not seeking a "boytoy" or to train anyone.
8. Yes, I am a Parrothead. Yes, I know all the songs.
9. And geez, my "Floridaflyer" handle has no sexual undertones. Really.
10. If you don't know what a Parrothead is, try the internet?
11. Yes, I am somewhat of an alpha female but always kind and respectful to everyone.
12. Yes, I really am Irish. Go figure.
13. No, I don't need to be spanked. No, I don't want to spank you either.
14. No, I won't be your tour guide when you're in town.
15. What kind of undies do I wear? (Ugh!)
16. Am I turned on by men in panties and hose? Seriously? No.
17. I don't care if your wife "misunderstands" you. Or is in prison. Or in a nursing home.
18. You want a pic of my feet? Are you kidding me?
19. No, I do not want to pretend to be your mommy. That's just wrong.
20. No, my pics were not taken during the Reagan Admin. They are all very recent. 
21. And...even if you were married and looked like Brad Pitt, I would NOT be interested for ANY reason or excuse you may provide. Got it?


Sadly, all true. No flippin' kidding.

I Wonder Why The Ratio is Ten Men To One Women?

Seriously?

Note the Confederate flag in the backgroud. Nice touch.

I think going into a convent may be more appropriate for me at this time.

Gawd help me.

Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith

I am not sure why all these 20-25 year old men keep contacting me. Yes, I know, they want to get laid. But why me?

You'd think that there are plenty of young women out there but what's up with a 21 year old looking at a 48 year old woman? A mommy fixation? Looking for a teacher? What?

Well...

I am not going to be someone's "teacher". Too busy for that.

I'm not a "cougar" who needs a young'un to make me feel better about myself. Flattering? Oh yes, but not something I hold in high regard.

I want someone who knows what he is doing and has the same life experiences. More so, knows that it is not all about his satisfaction. Experience is everything...

So, the interest is very nice but I'd prefer a sweet, experienced and imperfect 40-50 year old any day. 

Peace.

Here We Go Again...

Hmmm.... 

I think I caught one. Married, I think. Pretty darn sure...

I always go with my gut and ask alot of questions. I'm getting good at this -- unfortunately.

If someone posts on their online dating profile "No married/attached men", then why waste someone's time? And be flippin' dishonest?  

F*cker. (Sorry, that's the only word that fits.)

If we couldn't laugh we would all go insane. ~Jimmy Buffett

Gee, I received a ton of email about my blog posts. Wow. Oddly enough from some very nice people who encouraged me to write more. 

I am not sure that I will become a regular daily blogger but I will try to post when I can. Life is hectic for me = two states, two homes, two cars, two pets and two mortgages... and only one life to live. All good.

Someone asked me this question today: Who are you?

Answer: Just a good-hearted gal who is simply pushing her personal boundaries but wonders why she continues her membership on an online dating site. I live my life as if it were a constant adventure. Always with passion and humor. Daily education is what keeps me going. I'm always seeking to learn and be enlightened by life's experiences. I am probably someone you'd never expect to see "out there" on a dating site and doubtful if you saw me in Home Depot that I'd turn your head. That's ok. I am just a regular gal with a brain, spine, attitude and most definitely a good heart. And that's fine by me.

So, there you go.

Double WTF...

I was just contacted by a man locally who was interested in an "Adult Nursing Relationship". Huh?

You've got to be kidding me!

Now, I am the first person who tries not to judge people by their kinks but....seriously? Wow.

I think nursing a child is a beautiful thing but... a grown man?? I gotta tell you, us women sometimes feel that we "breastfeed" the world as it is but in an intimate relationship with a 40 year old man ...with a beard? I don't think so...

Xanax may be more comforting...don't you think? Try that.

Double WTF.

What's Up With Bi Chicks?

As Jerry Seinfeld once said... "Not that there's anything wrong with that!"

To all those ladies out there; why do you feel the need to "convince" me that I could possibly be bisexual and not even know it?

I'm not.

I'm cool with anyone's sexuality including mine and quite open-minded about most things. But, it's just not me.

Whatever floats your boat. My boat is just fine and sailing nicely...

Fair Winds and Following Seas. (As the Navy boys say...)

Peace.

Beauty Is In The Eye Of The Beholder.

OK, I can't just focus on the negative when blogging so I shall comment on 2 very nice compliments directed at me today.

"You have brass!"

I am assuming he is talking about testicles though I hope he knows I don't have mine hanging between my legs. I prefer to carry mine in my purse. Us women are much more practical.

"You look awesome for... 48."
I had to think about that one since it sounded a bit backhanded. Gosh, if I was 28, would I only look mediocre? And why does the age have to even be included? But he was sweet enough to clarify his remark so I shall view the intent instead of the words.

Yes, as brutally honest as they sound, it's all good. And I happily accept these nice compliments coming from the male gender.

Aloha.

A Giant, A Midget And A Man With A Chicken....

This sounds like the start of a joke, doesn't it?

It's not.

In a matter of 3-4 days, I've received emails from 2 men -- one was a little person (Midget) in GA and the other was a 7 ft tall man in Poland.

And they kindly included photos of their individual erections with huge smiles on their faces. How nice. My eyes!

I won't even tell you about the man who sent me a pic of him and his pet chicken.

I don't know how much more strangeness I can take.

Seriously. Is it me??

It's All About Perception...

"Moxie - the ability to face difficulty with spirit and courage."
A nice man sent me an email telling me he "liked my moxie". I've heard that word a few times over the years to describe me. But as with anyone's perception, one man's view of "moxie" is another man's "pain in the ass".

Or spunky.

Or gutsy.

Or even b*tch.

I gladly own it all. It's me.

With that said, I cannot help to think about things much more important than this site or what real courage is all about. And the true meaning of the word hero.

We lost 31 young warriors yesterday. Pray for them.
Peace.

He Doesn't Know What He Doesn't Know...

Here we go again...

I received an email from a 19 year old boy. Yes, I say boy because "man" just doesn't sound right.

HotStudxxxx, (yes, that was his handle) at the ripe old age of 19, states that I am exactly what he seeks. He is looking for an older woman to teach him "things".

Yeh, right.

I naturally responded back with a negative and needless to say, I was viewed as being "hateful" and that I "could probably not keep up with him".

Yeh, right.

A 40+ year old woman can't keep up with a 19 year old? What? Don't most teenagers last as long as a drive through at McDonalds? (It's faded out of my memory so I'm not sure.)

He just doesn't know what he doesn't know...

Someday, HotStudxxxx.

Never Ceases To Amaze Me...

It never ceases to amaze me the garbage I get in my mailbox. I got this from a 58 year old married man in the local area:

Iv been faithfully married for almost 40 years. im a retired nuclear engineer & we live comfortably. for almost my entire marriage iv tried to get my wife to get into swinging but she not only refuses we have been to therapy; almost went to divorce. but now iv deceided i want to swing with or without her. so if u would go for that lifestyle; would like to have sex many times a day; i am an expert at eating xxxxxxxxx and  im 7 inches. if i like u, i would leave my wife for u. if u would agree to live that way that means no more work just sex; u can have sex with anyone u want. also im not bad lookng am very clean, not overweight. so lets get together!

Unbelievable. 

A pig with no social skills. Or a clue.

Shoot me now.